Every cloud has a silver lining.

I clicked a like button for a post on this note platform.
A message popped out.

 Every cloud has a silver lining.

It released me from negative thoughts.
Chin up and do what I can do now. 

A position as an overseas salesperson brought me to my current company. 
I had three interviews for the role so I had considered it a given that I would start working there after on-site training at the factory. This is my job hunting record.

However, it turned out false last Friday.
Ok, cut to the chase.

1. The sales department manager told me that I served as a domestic sales for three years.

2.  A mid-career recruit joins the international sales team.

What? Why? 
I felt like I got caught in a sudden rain. 
Disappointed. Suspicious. Confused. Frustrated. Bothered. 
These words filled with my thoughts.
The situation doesn't fit right with me even now.

I am deceived.
You guys are so insincere.

That's my true feeling, to be honest. 
I decided to join the company because they assured me of the role of overseas sales. Nobody told me it might be assigned to the domestic sales department.  
The manager said it was one of the steps to becoming a professional overseas salesperson. If you really think so, you guys are accountable to me. It is the same as cheating. 

Even if I assume that I accept their statement, three years are totally unacceptable! It's too long to wait. I will be a giraffe. haha. 

Anyway, I felt doomed and cheated.
This incident gave me a trigger to make a plan for a job change.

Simultaneously, I was disappointed in myself.
This is because I wouldn't work there as a domestic sales. 
It proved my self-analysis was perfectly halfway.

I need a reason to work there, but I can't see it.
A job without English seems trivial to me.

自分の言葉に言いかえるなら、そうだな〜
"English can bring out another charm in me, even ones I haven't noticed."
かしら。すごく、良ッ……！（この世は自己満足の世界）

From 「英語は対話のための道具？うるせぇし。」

This article told me I loved using English. 
English drives me crazy. Time flies so fast when I speak, write, listen, and read it. I have been trying to regard English as a communication tool, but the post revealed my interest in the language. It will follow me forever whatever I do and wherever I am.

It might be contradicted, but I want to find a new job filled with my strong desire to use English, and worth doing without English.

This three-month factory training convinced me to work in foreign countries, not a two-week business trip. 

Thank you for reading my messy blog. It makes my head clear.
So, let's wrap it up by declaring the next actions because every cloud has a silver lining. Nothing will happen unless I chin up and move forward.

1. Do self-analysis to find my ideal work style.

2. Keep learning English.

3. Talk to my friends.

4. Ask my team leader if I could get a chance to work on international projects.

I'm going to talk to the leaders about my goals, but I doubt the three-year timeline will change. I'll start making moves to switch jobs by next summer.

Stay tuned for the next chapter of this story.