英文ライティング修行(2)

social media の良いところと悪いところについて。

Social media platforms tend to be (1) a hotbed of societal challenges. Reports frequently highlight that users, ranging from regular people to high-profile celebrities, encounter malicious comments and, at times, defamation due to their posts. Some users engage in sharing provocative or discriminatory content for increased viewership. Despite the function to block or curtail such content, a stream of adverse remarks persistently emerge. Furthermore, the risk of personal information being exposed is significant. Once it goes online, personal data is indelible, (2) posing a risk to privacy and safety. These dangers can lead to emotional distress, reputational damage, and in severe cases, catastrophic outcomes.

1. breeding grounds for…でもいいかも。ただ、ちょっと犯罪現場っぽくなるので、hotbedにしました。

2. posing a risk to privacy and safety は exacerbating concerns over privacy and safety も使える。

Conversely, (1) social media has its upsides. The online platform fosters creativity and connectivity. It enables  content creators, including YouTubers and vloggers, to disseminate innovative and insightful videos, blogs, and images about something hitherto unknown to us. Success on these platforms can translate into significant financial gain. Notably, a Japanese singer's rise to fame through social media (2) exemplifies the potential for achievement through (3) creative endeavors.

1. social media has its upsides. は there is also a positive side to social media. でもいいかも。

2. (1) For example…ではなく exemplify を使いました。

3. (2) creative endeavors は「創造的努力」というコロケーションで『ウィズダム英和辞典　第3版』に掲載。

Given the merits and demerits of the social media sites, I believe that the proliferation of misleading information on social media (1) warrants more rigorous regulatory measures. In fact, in the event of a disaster, inaccurate or misleading posts for monetary gain can be observed on numerous occasions, which undermines the platforms' credibility. It is imperative for social media companies to intensify their efforts in combating such abusive behavior through the enforcement of stringent policies, including the suspension of offending accounts diffusing spam or misinformation. Enhancing these safeguards will not only create a safer environment for authentic content creators but also (2) revamp the overall user experience.

1. necessitate は浮かびやすいので、warrantの方がカッコいいかも。OLEX2には、Supporting terrorism warrants a severe punishment. という例文が載っていて流石だと思いました。あと、stricter や more severe は浮かびやすいので、rigorous を使いました。

2. improve は浮かびやすいので、revamp を使いました。advance, augment, elevate, amplify などもありますね。