240613 説明能力と憧情

自分の言動の説明が
付けられナかった事は無いですか

恥ずかしながら
僕は未だに有ったりします

少し時間が経つと
キチンと説明できるんですが
その瞬間はダメだったりします

こう書くと
きっと普段の付き合いの方々は
驚くと想いますね

でもソレは
必死に意識的に生きて来た
意識的で在らんと繰り返し
皮膚反射的に振舞える様にシた

或る種の訓練の成果なんです
(^^♪

打率みたいに話せば
子供の頃は
ほぼ総て説明不能でした(+_+)

コレでは往かん
と高校の頃には１/３位は
説明デキる様にナったかな…

今では総てデキます
でも勘違いも含んで
居るやも知れません

完全なんて無いと想ってますし
どうやら僕
其処まで成長するタマでも
無さそうです┐(´д｀)┌

独りにナれたら
大体反省会をシて居ます
行動や発言
諸々を振り返り総決算です

赤面はシなくナって来ました
面の皮は厚くナって行くのです

それでも
あぁ～
みたいな事はゼロ
にはナらないんです

巷間PDCAと呼ばれる内省の輪は
その回転を止めたりはシないのです

240613 Accountability and yearning

Have you ever been unable to explain your words or actions?

I'm ashamed to admit
I still have.

After a while.
I can explain myself.
but not at that moment.

I'm sure that when I write this
I'm sure people I know on a regular basis would be surprised

But that's because
I've been living consciously for a long time.
I've repeatedly tried to be conscious.
It's a result of a kind of training

It's the result of a kind of training.
(♪ ^^♪

If you talk about it like batting average
When I was a child
I was almost totally unexplainable (+_+)

By the time I was in high school
I could explain about 1/3 of it...

Now I can explain everything.
But there may be some misunderstandings...
I don't know.

I don't think I'm perfect.
I don't know.
I don't think I'll ever grow up to be that good.

When I'm left alone
I usually have a meeting to reflect on what I did and said.
What I do, what I say.
I look back on what I did, what I said, and how I did it.

I don't blush anymore.
I'm getting thicker skinned.

But still...
Oh, no.
Things like that will never go away.

The circle of introspection known as PDCA
never stops its rotation.

by DeepL