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About Being Kind to Girls


  Lately, I've been thinking a lot about how difficult it is to be kind to girls. I'm turning 34 years old this year, and I believe I've had my fair share of experiences with girls. As I grow older, I've come to realize just how challenging it can be to be kind to girls. I want to make it clear that being kind to girls is not inherently difficult. Giving them a ride home, carrying their bags, giving thoughtful gifts, complimenting their clothes—these are things even high schoolers can do. What I find difficult is the technique of being kind to girls while not eliciting the response, "You're so kind, Haruki." It's incredibly hard to explain why we shouldn't want girls to say, "You're kind." Perhaps this understanding can only come with age. How about that! I'd like to say, but even I used to fail miserably when trying to be kind to girls. I still remember a particular incident when I was seventeen years old. At the time, I commuted to a high school in Kobe on the Hankyu train every day. One morning at Hankyu Ashiyagawa Station, I noticed a very cute high school girl struggling with a paper bag caught in the train door. I couldn't let this opportunity pass. I immediately rushed over and said, "Let me help you pull it," to which she responded, "Oh, thank you." Everything seemed fine until the moment I pulled with all my strength and the paper bag tore into two, scattering its contents onto the railway tracks. It was an incredibly awkward situation. There was no room left for kindness. I muttered, "Oh, well, I'm sorry," and left it to the station staff before making my escape. Although it happened seventeen years ago, I still want to apologize to that girl from Konan High School. I didn't mean any harm.

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