慧子／８．独りの夕食　Keiko／８．Lonely supper

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　その後も、クラスメイトたちの議論が続いた。自由意志の定義によって実験結果の解釈は変わってくるとクレアが発言すると、ロバート・キャラダインからたちまち反論が飛んできた。「明瞭に意識して言葉で表現できる決定の他に意思決定と言えるものはあり得ない。したがってクレアの論点は無効である」――ロバートはそう主張し、４、５人のクラスメイトが賛同の意思を示したため、クレアは黙らされる形になった。
　慧子は、ロバートのような決めつけが実験結果の解釈を混乱させているのではないかと思ったが、面倒に巻き込まれるのを避けるため、発言は控えた。幸い、その後、慧子は誰からも発言を求められることなく、授業は終わった。
   After that, the discussion among classmates continued. When Claire said that the interpretation of the experimental results would change depending on the definition of free will, Robert Carradine immediately countered. He said Claire's argument was invalid because there can be no decision-making other than a decision that can be consciously and clearly expressed in words. Four or five classmates expressed their opinion in favor of Robert, and Claire was silenced.
   Keiko thought such a rigid view of free-will as Robert's has made the interpretation of the results confusing. But she she refrained from speaking up this because she didn't want to get into trouble. Luckily, Tim's class ended without Keiko being asked to speak any more.
 
　ひとたび討議が終わると、それまで喧々諤々と意見を闘わせていたことなど忘れたかのように、クラスメイトたちは、日常の生活と普段の友人関係に戻っていった。少なくとも、慧子の目には、そのよう見えた。
　慧子は、日本人の間だと議論が感情問題になって後を引くことが多いのに対し、アメリカ人はそういうことがあまりないように感じるのだが、それは、まだアメリカに来たばかりで、アメリカ人をよく知らないだけだという気もした。
   Once the discussion was over, the classmates went back to their normal lives and normal friendships, as if they had forgotten they had heated discussion. At least in Keiko's eyes, it looked that way. Keiko feels that while Japanese people tend to take it emotional when they have heated discussion, Americans don't often do that. But she also felt that, having been in America for just three months, she just didn't know Americans very well.
   Keiko felt that while Japanese people tended to take it emotional when they had heated discussion, Americans didn't often do so. But she also felt that, having been in America for just three months, she just didn't know Americans very well.

　日本からの見学者、特に、父と同じ大学に勤務し授業中に慧子に発言を求めた田代から声をかけられるのではないかと心配したが、田代をはじめとする見学者たちはティムとの会話に熱心で、生徒たちにはあまり注意を向けてこなかった。一度、田代が慧子に視線を送ってきたように感じたが、それも自分の気のせいだろうと思い、慧子は、教室を後にした。
    Keiko was worried that the visitors from Japan, especially Tashiro, who worked at the same university as Keiko’s father and asked Keiko to speak during the class, would talk to her, but Tashiro and other visitors were enthusiastically talking with Tim and paid little attention to the students. Just for a moment, Keiko felt like Tashiro was giving her a gaze, but Keiko thought it was just her imagination and Kleft the classroom.

　 慧子が19時に家に帰り着いた時、外はまだ真昼の明るさだったが、空気は急に冷え込み始めていた。家に母の姿はなかったが、それは毎日のことだった。
　母は、勤め先の研究所のカフェテリアで夕食をとり、それからまた、〇時近くまで研究を続けて、夜中に帰ってくる。母は自分の車で通勤しているのだが、時々、男性の車で送られてくる。次の朝、母がどのように出勤しているのか、慧子は、先に家を出るので知らなかったし、知りたくもなかった。
  When Keiko arrived home at 19:00, it was still bright outside like noon, but the air had suddenly started to get cold. Her mother was not at home as usual. 
   Keiko's mother would have dinner in the cafeteria of the research institute where she worked, and then continue her research until nearly midnight, and then come back in the middle of the night.  Though she commuted in her own car, but sometimes she was sent in a man's car. Keiko neiither knew how she was going to the labo in the next morning because Keiko left for school before her mother went out, nor wanted to know.

　慧子は、いつもどおり一人で夕飯の支度をした。慧子は、一人で食事するのに慣れていた。日本で暮らしていたころも、父と母はそれぞれの研究に忙しく、二人よりも先に帰宅する慧子は、いつも自分の分だけの食事を作って食べていた。父と母は、それぞれ外食して帰るので、二人の分を作り置く必要はなかったのだ。
   Keiko prepared supper by herself.  She was used to eating alone. Even when she was living in Japan, her father and mother were busy with their respective researches at their labos, and Keiko, who came home before the parents, always cooked and ate her own meals.  Because her parents took had dinner respectively on their way home, Keiko did not have to make their meals.  

　もっとも、正確に言うと、慧子は、料理を作ってはいなかった。買い置きしてある冷凍食品を電子レンジで温めて食べるだけだったから。自分独りのために調理と後始末の手間をかけるのは面倒だった。
　今日も、冷凍庫からプラスチックのトレーに入ったミールセットを取り出して電子レンジで温めたものを食べた。これなら、皿洗いの手間もない。
   To be precise, though, Keiko wasn't cooking. She just warmed frozen food in the microwave and ate it. She didn't feel like going through the trouble of cooking and cleaning up for herself. Today too, she took out a meal set in a plastic tray from the freezer and warmed it up in the microwave. That way, she didn’t have to worry about washing dishes.

　食事を終えた慧子は、丁寧に時間をかけて、緑茶と和菓子のデザートを用意した。夕食後のこのデザートにだけは、慧子は時間をかける。茶葉と和菓子は日本の一流店からインターネット通販で購入している。このデザートを味わっている時間だけは、慧子は、アメリカ生活のプレッシャーから自分を解放することができるのだった。
   After finishing her meal, Keiko took her time to meticulously prepare her dessert of Japanese green tea and Japanese sweets. Keiko took her time only for this dessert after dinner. She bought both tea leaves and sweets from a leading Japanese store on the Internet, and while enjoying this dessert, Keiko was able to release herself from the pressures of her American life.

　日本の初夏の緑を思い起こさせる爽やかな緑茶の香りに浸っていると、ふと、ティムが口にしたある表現が慧子の頭に浮かんだ。
   While immersed in the refreshing scent of green tea that reminded her of the greenery of early summer in Japan,  an expression that Tim used suddenly popped up in her mind.

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