2023年も、6ヶ月後には過去になる🕰️

はじめに

＊この記事は、この音楽を聴いてる時に書かれました。
臨場感を味わいたい方は、音楽を流しながらお読みください。
＊This post has been written while I was listening to this song.
If you wanted to have immersive experience of this post, you could play this song and read this through.

本編

もうすぐ2023年の半分が終わる。
It’s almost half way through 2023.

今年も、文章では到底書ききれないほど本当にたくさんのことがあった。
今、今、今が連なり、いつの間にやら2023年も6月を通過し終える一歩前！
There has been so many things, too many things to write here that happened this year.
The sequences of now, now, and now…
And the end of June 2023 is just one step forward from being crossed its line！

今年体験したどんなに美しい過去たちも、日々の新しい体験を重ねていくうちにきっと少しずつその新鮮さを失っていくのだろう。
No matter how beautiful these experiences of this year so far were to be, they will surely lose their freshness little by little as I accumulate new experiences day by day.

それは変わり続けることしかできないこの世界において、仕方のないことなのだと受け入れつつそれでも、どうしてもこの記憶たちをなるべく鮮明に覚えていたいと願っている自分が同時に居る。
だって簡単に忘れてしまうにはあまりにも愛しすぎたから。
I am aware of the fact that this is inevitable in a world that can only continue to change, but at the same time, there is a part of me still wishes to remember all these memories as vividly as possible.
Because… they were just too stunningly beautiful to forget easily.

あの朝の日の出の音、温度、肌にまとわりつく汗、不思議と共存していた高揚感と安堵感、初めて訪れる場所に感じた懐かしさ、全ての細かな気づきが一つずつパズルのように繋がって、その気づきたちと自分の存在がひとつになった感覚...。
The sound of the sunrise in that morning, that temperature, that sweat that flowed around my skin, the elation and relief that strangely yet comfortably came together, the nostalgia that I felt for the place even it was first time to visit, the feeling of all the small parts of puzzle has been connected, and the feeling of all these realization came together with the self……

特別な日の記憶だけじゃない。
Not just the memory of special days.


ある朝の穏やかさ、ズレる可笑しみ、思い余って力む身体、窓から吹き入る生暖かく優しい風、骨の隙間にまで届いて全てを洗い流してくれた川、なぜか逸らしてしまった目線、祝福も痛みも、踊り過ぎて軋み始めた肩甲骨も、全部全部、今となれば、愛しかったのだと気づく。
The calmness of one morning, the tickling feeling of displacement, the body that strains with too much feeling of wanting to deliver something, the fresh gentle river that blew from the window, the river that reached into every crevice of my bones and washed everything away, the eyes that broke the contact somehow against my will, the blessings, the pain, and the shoulder blades that began to creak from dancing too much…Everything was beautiful. Once I look back.

私たちが目を閉じ、過去の在りし日の風景を瞼の裏に写し、その場所の風を感じている時きっと、私たちは過去を今に引き連れてきている。
そしてまた同じく、まだ未だ来ていない未来を夢想してその光景に胸を高鳴らせている時、私たちはきっと、未来を今に引き連れてきている。

When we close our eyes and see the scenery from the past in the back of our eyelids and feel the air of the place, we might be bringing the past into the present.
And like that, when we dream of a future that has yet to come and make our hearts flutter, we might be bringing the future into the present.

過去を引き連れた「今」でも、「今」の今でも、はたまた未来を引き連れた「今」でも、どの「今」でも、今というこの瞬間に深く潜れば潜るほど、より高く飛ぶことができて、胸を開けば開くほど、時空を超えて網のように張り巡らされた繋がりたちが確かさを増していく。
そんな感覚があって、その確かさが増せば増すほど、過ぎゆく「今」たちがまた更に愛しくなった。
Whether it is the “now” with the past in tow, the “now” that is in now, or the “now” with the future in tow, whichever of the “now” it were to be,
the deeper I dive into the present moment, the higher I fly and the more I open my chest, the more existences of the connections that is casted through time and space like a net become certain.
That’s kind of the feeling that I’m getting and the more certain they become, the more beautiful the “nows” that passes through me became.

今思えば、今まで過去や未来から私の元を訪れた「今」たちが居たけれど、私はその遥々訪れてきた彼らを、だいぶ粗末に扱っていた気がする。
Now I think back, there has been “nows” that visited me time to time from past and future, but I feel like I’ve been treating them whom traveled all the way to get here rather poorly.


彼らは美しい景色に続く扉を運んでくれていたのに。
Although they were bringing doors to the beautiful field.

もし、ふと、何かがきっかけで呼び起こされる過去や未来があるなら、彼らは私の中で、今もまだ/もう既に、起き続けて/起き始めて、いるのかもしれない。本当はずっとここに居たのか、突然遊びに来たのか。
どちらにせよ、在る、居る、から、その名残りともサインとも思える彼らを大切に掬って大きなハグをして、どこまでも味わってやりたい。
If there was a past or future that has been suddenly evoked by something, maybe that past is still happening to me/ maybe that future is already happening to me. They might have been here from the first place, or they might have come here suddenly just to play with me.
Either way, they are here, so I’d like to cherishingly scoop up the remnants? sign? of them, hug them and taste them fully.

2023年も後半。
時間がポコンと空いて、過去や未来が今に訪れた時には喜んで迎え入れて、その後は只、彼らの存在を隣に感じながら一緒に過ごすだけの時間を作ってみることにしようと思う。
それが、彼らに今の私ができる最大の愛情表現だと思うから。
It’s almost the time that later half of this year will bigin.
If I have some free puff time and they happen to visit me, I’m thinking of welcoming them with big hug and after that to spend some time to just be together with them.
Cuz i think that’s the best thing that I can do for now to express the love that I have for them.

そうしているうちに、この身体に色んな“時”が集まって、記憶を超えた、感覚だけが確かなものとなって地図のように刻まれて、いつでも、どの自分へへも自由に飛んでいけるのだと思うのです。

I will just be with them, whereupon various "times" gather in this body.
Eventually, they will transcend the memory and only the senses will remain and will be engraved like a map. Thereupon, I feel , we can fly freely to any of our selves at any time.

過ぎゆく、来たる、全ての「今」たちへ、ありがとう🫧
Thank all the “nows” that passes through me and comes to me.

それでは今日も、Have a beautiful night!

2023年後半も、Let’s enjoy!