Selfless love, how difficult it is to love someone without asking love back, from Legal high and NARUTO

What humans are is ugly

Recently, I've watched a drama "Legal high" and a manga "NARUTO". there's a lot of things i considered, so i wanna share it.
First, from Legal high. On the final episode of season2, when Komikado crushed Hanyu.
Here are the scene from the final. 

Hanyu "we should believe human's grace, not ugliness, because everyone has it." "Where am i wrong?"
Komikado "where you think you're not wrong." "what humans truly are is egoistic, selfish, ugly, scum of the bottom. that's how we are."
Hanyu "so, that's why i'm trying to lead them…"
Komikado "that's wrong, you gotta back off from it, then you gotta accept you're also one of the scum." "you love your smartness, love the way you dedicate to people. You said you wanna get everyone happy, win-win, but that's just your desire. "
Hanyu "I'm just doing my best,,, while crying"
Komikado "if you really wanna make everyone happy, there's only one way." "Love the ugliness."

That's a very great scene.
Hanyu tried to be a hero, felt comfortable to get everyone looked win-win. i'll tell you later, Naruto is also one of them. But, Komikado knew Hanyu had that type of desire, every human has own desire. he described it as a ugliness, but i could also say as a foolishness, desire, ideal, want, utility, hope.  

What we can say from above is, however you say in a way it looks good, at the end of the day you wanna satisfy yourself. if you can't see it, you will have troubles with humans. that's why Komikado said, "Love the ugliness(humans always try to satisfy themselves)."

What is love without asking love back, examples from NARUTO

Next is NARUTO.
It has love without asking love back, selfless love in the entire story. I'll give you examples of Naruto&Kushina, Minato, Sasuke&Itachi, Sasuke&Naruto.

When Kushina&Minato tried to seal Kyubi, they sacrificed their lives to protect Naruto hoping he would be fine. I think this is definitely selfless love. it's from parents to kids, only in between a family.  especially on eternity, there's only in between family.

Itachi killed every Uchiha to accomplish the mission from Konoha village. but he'd protected only Sasuke while he got a name of betrayer, got hated by Sasuke. Also, when he reincarnated, met Sasuke, he said to Sasuke "you don't have to forgive me, whatever you'll become, I'll love you." This is definitely selfless love.
From the other perspective, Sasuke really loved Itachi before he killed every Uchiha. There's a Japanese word"愛憎ai-zou" this means love and hate. we love someone that's why we hate them. we expect someone loves back bc we love that someone, but once we get betrayed, we hate that someone. this explanation is also used with Sharingan eyes. In other words, love and hate is two sides of the same coin.  

I think this can be said to relationship partner too. if it rings the bell, you probably asked someone love back, and you got to hate.
to solve this, one way is not to expect too much from someone, and give your selfless love. 
now the question is, can we do that to other people even when they are not family?
Theme is about love relationship, please follow me a little longer.

Sasuke&Naruto is a good example ended up well. Sasuke tried to destroy the Konoha village that had got Itachi suffered. Naruto understood Sasuke shouderd everything by his own, felt sympathy for him. That's why he wanted to solve it by saving Sasuke. This is also desire of Naruto.

In the end, Naruto successfully saved Sasuke. Once, I researched Avoidant personality disorder. They tend to avoid people bc they don't wanna get hurt. i guess Sasuke also avoids Naruto to avoid getting hurt. The solution of this disorder is having a base that provides them love whatever happens. Naruto lost his arm to stop Sasuke. That kinda attitude stopped Sasuke being avoidant. Naruto had desire to heal his pain occurred by sympathy. but, the acting he lost his arm meant a lot for Sasuke.

the conclusion of selfless love

On Legal high, we learned every human has ugliness.
From NARUTO, we learned selfless love from parents to kids can sacrifice life. we can see selfless love from Itachi to Sasuke. these are in between a family.
From Naruto to Sasuke, they are not family, but he sacrifice his arm.
What we can say now is, selfless love can be described with 2 measures. 
The 1st one is what you want from someone you love.
desire for someone to be just happy ⇔ desire for someone to love me back(desire to be satisfied with myself).
The 2nd one is how much you sacrifice.
to give up your life, body and your time or your money.
now i can say Naruto had desire for Sasuke to be happy. 
Komikado probably would say, Naruto had his own desire too, but it happend to be a win-win. 
What's important is, it's another person,  it's not us who decides if it's selfless love or not by using 2 measures. It's not us. 

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Application to romantic styles

now let's think about love relationship, if it's going well all you have to do with is just 2 measures. what's the most crucial is after you fail. As you know, people are ugly, so sometimes we think like why he/she doesn't give me love back even though I love so much like this. We ask for a return, even when we understand in theory. and then, we could hate each other. But preventing from asking for return is difficult especially when you just break up unless you're Mother Teresa. Originally, why we ask for a return, the reason is I think because you're fixated on your lover so much. if you're fixated with something else, like hobbies it'd be prevented. so you may need an attitude to satisfy your desires by your own. 
in chronological order, before a relationship you gotta not be fixated too much, in a relationship gotta use 2 measures properly, after a relationship forget it asap. hate doesn't produce nothing. After you fail, to make it better you gotta think like I just wanted to satisfy my desire that needed to be loved. Even if it's a partner, he or she is just someone else. you can't control someone except yourself.
now im getting to think what's more important is to prevent a failure. in that sense, as 2 measures show, you should always show your love, use your brain to make your partner happy. Don't ask for a return. I believe that leads to a growing as a person. If you can become that person, you can get close to God with grace, clemency, charity. As a lesson to me and you, we should be a person who can give. just hope someones happiness.
As I googled the meaning of 慈愛(zi-ai, it means grace, clemency, charity in Japanese), there's a similar thought in Buddhism. it turned out that there was people who had understood people's minds from thousands years ago. That means people haven't changed in just 2000 years. it takes 50000 years to change in genetics. As society has been changing quickly, but we have to adopt to it.

For me, I've got a similar experience.
Thanks for being with me, I just wanted it to be organized, solved. It'd be probably an ugly desire. 
When I was abroad to study English, my Christian friend told me, you have bright, calm vibes, that affects people with you. that's why we're together now. 
To make efforts to be a person who can give, and improve your spirit levels, you could meet people with higher spirits. that would lead to a best partner for you.
Again, let's be a person who can give without asking for a return.

have a great day.