I want to talk about my new song "This world, that is ephemeral".
※In translating the article into English, there are parts of the article that I have edited.
Hi there. I am regulus.
As is becoming a tradition, I'd like to talk passionately about a new song.
Like the other songs I've written about before, this song is from my 7th album "Absolute Zero".
If you haven't read the article yet, please check out the previous articles to get a better understanding.
So let's get to the lyrics to talk about the content.
Lyrics （Original Lyrics are written in Japanese）
夢の続きをまだ見ていたのね
You're still dreaming about the rest of your dream
恐れるものなんかは何も無かったのに
There wasn't anything to fear for us
答えを知ることが怖くなったの
I was afraid of knowing the answers
伝わるその恐怖が夢を崩していく
That fear which is transmitted, crumbles the dream
何の為？誰の為？
What's that for? Who's that for?
まだ消えないで消せないでいるの
It hasn't gone away yet, and I can't make it go away
迷って立ってる夢の淵
I'm lost, standing on the edge of a dream
君の髪 君の指
Your hair, your fingers
ただ美しく儚いままで壊れないように
Just stay beautiful and fragile and don't break
嗚呼、愛おしい
Ah, lovely
君の声が ねえ 聴こえないよ
I can't hear your voice
まだこの世界終わるまで少しあるのでしょう？
We still have a little bit of time before the end of the world, don't we?
追いかけて景色の向こうまで
Follow it to the other side of the landscape
ただ儚くて壊れゆく一筋の光を
Just a fragile and broken ray of light
君の声が 君の顔が
Your voice, your face
消えるなら愚かしい
If it goes away, how foolish it would be
この夢が この願いが
This dream, this wish
叶うなら色を失くすように
If it comes true, it will lose its color
全て終わることも気にしないで
Don't mind that it will be all over
互いに触れることを止めてはいけないわ
We must not stop touching each other
溺れていく鳥の羽のように
Like the feathers of a drowning bird
潰えるその命に切り離されるまで
Until we are cut off from that life
何の罪？誰の罰？
What crime? Who's punishment?
その苦しみを消せないでいるの
I can't make that pain go away
迷って待ってる夢の音
I'm lost, waiting for the sound of a dream
嘘でもいい囁いて今
Now you could lie or whisper to me that
凍らせて無くした人は私じゃないと
I'm not the one who froze it out and lost it
嗚呼、狂おしい
God, it's crazy
君の声が ねえ 聴こえないよ
I can't hear your voice
まだこの世界終わるまで少しあるのでしょう？
We still have a little bit of time before the end of the world, don't we?
追いかけて景色の向こうまで
Follow it to the other side of the landscape
ただ儚くて壊れゆく一筋の光を
Just a fragile and broken ray of light
君の声が 君の顔が
Your voice, your face
消えるなら愚かしい
If it goes away, how foolish it would be
この夢が この願いが
This dream, this wish
叶うなら色を失くすように
If it comes true, it will lose its color
First, let's take a metaphorical expression that is definitively obvious regardless of the 'breadth of interpretation' and represent it in its original meaning.
If you don't understand this, maybe you won't understand what I'm talking about.
Dream = The world as it was when she was still human, or the desire to still be.
Answer = Reality. The fact that she is no longer human.
This world (landscape) = Her own life. Subjective view of the world as reflected in her eyes.
The end = Death (perhaps closer to the death of the dignity she has as human beings than to the death of a living being).
Light = Hope for her. It would almost certainly refer to 'you'.
I think you need to follow the lyrics as you replace these in your mind semantically.
Also, the lyrics in this song are written in a female speaking style.
This is a bit unusual in my work. I don't usually do this because it's an element that limits interpretation, but this time I dared to do so to make it dramatic.
It's an element that is lost in translation, so it may be difficult to understand if you don't speak Japanese.
So, it's okay to understand that the lyrics are told by the main character's girl from a subjective point of view.
夢の続きをまだ見ていたのね
You're still dreaming about the rest of your dream
恐れるものなんかは何も無かったのに
There wasn't anything to fear for us
Actually, I wasn't sure if I should put a question mark on the first line.
But then it feels like she is simply asking a question with no certainty. That wasn't what I thought it was, so I didn't make it a question sentence.
Because even in the English translation, she says 'You', but she is actually speaking to herself, and it is a statement to her inner self, like another self in the mirror.
The aforementioned dream as a metaphor can be restored to its original meaning with the following nuance.
"You were still thinking about the peaceful life you had when you were human (turning away from reality)."
The second line suggests that what she fears now exists. And it almost explicitly refers to 'the end'.
Her greatest fears are of accepting that she is not a human being, and furthermore, that 'the end' that awaits her is. And it seems to be a combination of regret and resignation that she would not have to feel it if she had only dreamed it.
答えを知ることが怖くなったの
I was afraid of knowing the answers
伝わるその恐怖が夢を崩していく
That fear which is transmitted, crumbles the dream
I think the aforementioned explanation will help you understand this part of the story.
I was initially going to add a question mark here as well, but I decided not to because I thought it was different.
I still wanted to keep the nuance of 'I knew it, but I was turning away from it'.
And that escapism was hollow, and slowly reality was crumbling her dreams.
何の為？誰の為？
What's that for? Who's that for?
まだ消えないで消せないでいるの
It hasn't gone away yet, and I can't make it go away
迷って立ってる夢の淵
I'm lost, standing on the edge of a dream
As some of you may know, "I'm lost, standing on the edge of a dream" is a phrase from a song of mine called "Wisteria", and the melody and lyrics are the same. Of course it's on purpose.
Please note that this is exactly the same as the crossover I was talking about in "Doomsday", but it doesn't mean that the worlds are connected.
In this part, the writing is unclear in both Japanese and English, but I can't really give you a clear answer either.
You may be thinking, "Here we go again", but you're right.
The characters and I have different personalities, so I, even as the author, have to interpret the ideas that the characters have.
What is it that has not disappeared and cannot be extinguished?
Perhaps she is referring to the 'ray of light' mentioned below, but she could also be referring to a 'dream', and the idea that it is a statement that she still cannot give up hope despite the hopelessness of the situation is the first thing to consider.
However, on the contrary, it could be perceived as a statement that she is saying that the negative elements that she has been trying to turn away from, such as reality and guilt, will not disappear, but will come at her relentlessly.
I think it's more contextually appropriate to think of it as a statement about what the purpose of holding on to hope in a desperate situation is, given the sentence "What's that for? Who's that for? I'm lost, standing on the edge of a dream" that precedes and follows.
But I guess this is what I call 'breadth of interpretation'.
君の髪 君の指
Your hair, your fingers
ただ美しく儚いままで壊れないように
Just stay beautiful and fragile and don't break
嗚呼、愛おしい
Ah, lovely
There is no particular metaphorical expression in this part of the story, and the text itself is direct and easy to understand, but it's quite difficult to tell if there is a switch in perspective.
This is because it's not clear whether the boy who is loved by her said to her or simply she said to him.
The theory I'd like to push is that the first two lines are the boy's statement "You're beautiful, you're not a monster, don't be broken", and only the part "Ah, lovely" is the girl's response to the boy's statement and it's overflowing with emotion.
This is almost a fantasy now, though.
I think it's the best way for me to think of it as a statement in the process of transforming herself into something not human being, and the everyday life she had when she was human was sublimated into a more precious and lovable existence.
Furthermore, it could be a precursor to her going crazy as a monster in comparison to the similar parts discussed below.
Maybe it's because she's starting to go crazy, and that's why she's loving the routine that was the norm.
However, of course, it could also be that they are all her statements.
It could be a wish that those things are not broken because of her, or it could be that she wants to protect the things that are easily broken because she loves them.
It's too hard to know about this one.
君の声が ねえ 聴こえないよ
I can't hear your voice
まだこの世界終わるまで少しあるのでしょう？
We still have a little bit of time before the end of the world, don't we?
As we get into the chorus, the whole thing continues to be about her position as inhuman.
The voices that try to keep her in front of the Borderline no longer reach her, and she is steadily moving forward in time to the end (Doomsday).
Yet, there is still some respite left, isn't there?
That's the beginning of the chorus.
追いかけて景色の向こうまで
Follow it to the other side of the landscape
ただ儚くて壊れゆく一筋の光を
Just a fragile and broken ray of light
The two lines here are metaphorical and difficult to understand.
If I return to the original meaning of "follow the light to the other side of the landscape", it can be a nuance like,
"Don't give up hope that you almost lost, even if you become inhuman and the world that you see it now becomes the end".
Just a fragile and broken, which means that she could destroy it through her own fault.
If anything, it's mainly about the desire to chase the light, and perhaps the fear of destroying something important to her by herself, expresses the desire to escape from the fear again here.
"Ray of light" is exactly the only ray of hope she has when she is about to be engulfed in darkness, and if she loses it, she will fall into total darkness.
君の声が 君の顔が
Your voice, your face
消えるなら愚かしい
If it goes away, how foolish it would be
この夢が この願いが
This dream, this wish
叶うなら色を失くすように
If it comes true, it will lose its color
The second half of the chorus is not particularly difficult to follow, and is more direct.
If I had to put it another way, the last part of the section is poetic.
If I liken the state of not human being to being dyed in the color of evil, it's like, the color seems to slip away, or the evil color that clings to her seems to disappear as if it were a lie, the sentence is meant to be a release from such constraints.
But this, too, is based on the premise that she understands that this is not really going to happen, and that she is being swallowed up by those 'colors'.
全て終わることも気にしないで
Don't mind that it will be all over
互いに触れることを止めてはいけないわ
We must not stop touching each other
These two lines are normal at first glance, but they actually contain some pretty core setting details.
Because in the setting of the "Absolute Zero" story, 'touching' is really an action that leads directly to the end of everything.
I haven't published the full story yet, so I'm not sure if you'll understand it, but I'll re-post the text I wrote in a previous "Borderline" article.
This story revolves around the main character, a girl and a boy who is very close to her. The girl gets caught up in an incident, and as a result, she acquires inhuman abilities despite her human appearance, and becomes an entity that causes harm to others just by existing. Think of harm as a level of harm that can easily take a life.
The girl believes that no one would be unhappy without her, but the presence of boy prevents her from doing so.
In the midst of these conflicts, she is forced to make a choice that is objectively right: the strong desire for each other, the unreasonableness of having to give up even the idea of just existing, and the guilt born within herself.
This "objective" thing is tricky, and I'd like you to consider whose view of rightness should take precedence after all.
If the result is a choice that is said to be self-righteous, would you call it a 'sin'? Who will judge it as a 'sin'?
Still, she's saying that don't mind that it will be all over and that we must not stop touching each other.
I think this part of the story shows how strongly she loves him.
And what's more, it's no exaggeration to say that her intentions have already been decided here, and we can take it that she's beginning to think at this point that she's willing to sacrifice other things for the sake of something important.
溺れていく鳥の羽のように
Like the feathers of a drowning bird
潰えるその命に切り離されるまで
Until we are cut off from that life
Like the feathers of a drowning bird, for example, can be the falling leaves of a dying tree in another metaphorical expression, or, in a slightly silly way, the torn arm of a person becoming zombie.
In short, she is saying that the dying life is the main body, and that they should not stop touching each other until the moment she is separated from that dignified life and become worthless.
And it is undoubtedly she herself who is cutting off, which is why the cause of that is nothing more than 'touching' each other.
It's getting complicated.
To summarize, she is about to straddle the borderline and change from human to inhuman. That in itself is an irresistible force, but her real death as a human is in giving up her humanity and recognizing herself as a monster.
But for her to "touch" something is, in the setting, to hurt others by her ability, and to continue to do so of her own volition is to deny herself a dignified life and walk down the road to becoming a monster.
Can you see that she is going crazy?
As I also mentioned in "Ah, Lovely", She clings to the warmth by comparing her situation and future to the warmth of her past. Or like an addiction, we can read from this part that she is blindly craving the warmth.
I've never used it, so I don't know if it's an appropriate example, but it's the kind of situation where a person who dabbles in illegal drugs knows they will eventually break, but clings to that pleasure until they do.
For her, the act of touching someone she loves is a forbidden act that accelerates the fact that she is a monster and kills her true self.
It can be explained as a desperate feeling that, after being cut off from a dying life in this way, it doesn't matter anymore.
Incidentally, those of you with a better understanding might ask this question.
If 'touching' is an act that can easily take a life, why can she keep "touching" a boy?
I can't give you a concrete answer yet, but it's because he's special. Not because he himself is special, but because he is special to her. In other words, he is special in the sense that he is the exception.
But she can't help but feel her own sins, which are slowly eating away at even such a special man.
何の罪？誰の罰？
What crime? Who's punishment?
その苦しみを消せないでいるの
I can't make that pain go away
迷って待ってる夢の音
I'm lost, waiting for the sound of a dream
"Why did I have to go through this? I didn't do anything wrong."
That would be the word hiding behind the first line.
But the "suffering" here is nothing more than sense of guilt.
The person who says, "I've done nothing wrong," doesn't feel guilty.
It is a complete and utterly unfortunate accident that she has become inhuman and should have been nothing more than a victim, but the fact is that her continued existence has harmed so many lives.
"What crime? Who's punishment? "
Can you understand her exclaiming?
The only thread that keeps her there until the very end, when she completely crosses the borderline, is what I call 'the sound of a dream' here.
If she closes her eyes, the warm everyday, the gentle voice, the temperature of her loved ones, those 'the sound of a dream' will come back, perhaps. Such a hope postpones 'the end' altogether, if only a little.
嘘でもいい囁いて今
Now you could lie or whisper to me that
凍らせて無くした人は私じゃないと
I'm not the one who froze it out and lost it
嗚呼、狂おしい
God, it's crazy
This is the last part of the song to be explained in this song.
It's a lyric that has everything squeezed in, like an answer to what I've been explaining so far.
The line "whisper to me, even if it's a lie," is the line of someone who knows it's a lie 99%, but still wants to feel comfortable hearing those words.
(For those of you who can tell, the conversation between the two of them at the very end of "the Last of Us" is like that.)
It's not a metaphor to say that "I'm not the one who froze it out and lost it".
It's hard to explain further, but she understands that she herself is the one who did that, and that's why she wants him to say it, even if it's a lie.
And then, following that, the last line.
"God, it's crazy", in response to the aforementioned "Ah, lovely".
I don't need to explain any more, do I?
That's it for the lyrics.
"Borderline" was about the dimension of crossing the line between human and inhuman, but I would say that this song as a whole focuses on the change in the protagonist who crosses the line and goes crazy.
She's 99% of the way over the line now, but only 1% she still has humanity. That's the kind of song I'm talking about.
It's getting difficult to talk about the story unless I publish the full text of the story soon, so I apologize for that, but I will eventually publish it in full on the internet, so please be patient.
I'll see you next time.
Thank you for reading this far.
2020.09.28 regulus