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Let us forget this year.
‘T is the time of festivity!
Christmas is right around the corner, and I’m excited to see all the Christmas decorations in the store. Better get the shopping done!
In Japan, though, not many people are big on celebrating Christmas. Some might be, but at least where I am from and where I spent most of my time, the only Christmass-y thing we did was to eat a cake. This is not to say that Japanese people do not like festivity; to the contrary, we love celebrating! Just in a different way.
Around this time of the year, people in Japan are rushing to sort out their calendar so they can go to as many ‘forgetting the year party’ as possible. ‘Forgetting the year party’ is typically called Bonenkai (忘年会) in Japanese, and kanjis used in its name literally translate to ‘forget the year’.
In a nutshell, Bonenkai is a gathering with your friends, family, or co-workers to celebrate the passing of the old year to get ready to welcome the coming of new year. On the outside, it appears to be pretty much like a normal Nomikai (飲み会). But it has that special feeling to it because we are not only celebrating the end of the year, but we are also patting ourselves on the back for working hard throughout the year. And that’s probably why some people enjoy themselves a bit too much and end up doing something they regret later when they are sober. But, hey, who doesn’t have an embarrassing drunk story or two?
Origin of Bonenkai can date back to the Kamakura or even to the Muromachi era. Back then, it used to be a gathering of intelligentsia who would collectively compose a series of linked poems (連歌; Renga). The gathering used to be referred to as Toshi-wasure (年忘れ). During the Edo era, Toshi-wasure evolved into a type of gathering we now know as Bonenkai. People, particularly farmers, would gather around and have a drink to decompress after working so hard all year to make their living. Bonenkai became an annual event during the Meiji era, when students and young government officials who couldn’t afford to go back to their hometown on a holiday started celebrating the end of the year in Tokyo. Descriptions of Bonenkai are frequently found in some of the classic Japanese literature written around this time. For instance, Shoyo Tsubouchi (坪内逍遥) wrote in her novel "Forgetting the Year Gathering" (『忘年会』):
「声高な議論と沸くような笑い声、歌舞音曲に、お酌をする芸妓、そして何よりも大酒」
(Lively debate and bursting laughter, music for dancing, companions pouring sake, and most importantly, so much alcohol.)
Reference: https://kanzan.net/bekkan/20151028-1573/#:~:text=%E7%8F%BE%E5%9C%A8%E3%81%AE%E5%BF%98%E5%B9%B4%E4%BC%9A%E3%81%AB%E8%BF%91%E3%81%8F,%E3%81%9F%E3%81%AE%E3%81%8C%E3%83%AB%E3%83%BC%E3%83%84%E3%81%A7%E3%81%99%E3%80%82&text=%E4%B8%80%E6%96%B9%E3%80%81%E6%AD%A6%E5%A3%AB%E3%81%AF%E3%80%8E%E6%96%B0%E5%B9%B4%E4%BC%9A,%E9%81%95%E3%81%84%E3%82%92%E8%A6%8B%E3%81%9B%E3%81%9F%E3%81%A8%E3%81%8B%E3%80%82
Bonenkai season in the present day begins as early as the first week of December. But it is more typical and common to have Bonenkai towards the end of December, particularly after Christmas, when most people go on a holiday. Typically, people would have Shigoto-osame (仕事納め) anywhere between 26th and 30th of December, and that’s when they would have Bonenkai with their co-workers. Of course, not everyone gets to attend Bonenkai, depending on what type of job they have. And nowadays, there are more workplaces where employees prefer to have a small lunch party during the day rather than a Nomikai after work. Whatever form it is, though, it is important for the Japanese to celebrate and be proud of their hard-work at the end of the year. In other words, Bonenkai is a form of reward that people give themselves.
I remember when I was a uni student in Japan, I used to have Bonenkai with my friends. Back then, I lived in a small studio apartment in Takadanobaba, Tokyo. It was so small that a bed, desk, and fridge took most of the space! But for a group of broke uni students who were ready to celebrate, that was enough. We would bring a pack of beers, a bottle of wine, some munchies, and our favorite board game and movies. We would stay up all night, talk about random things, drink and eat, watch movies, play games, and congratulate ourselves for surviving yet another year.
I feel as though we all need a good Bonenkai, especially this year.
The year 2020 was a turbulence, if not a disaster. Global pandemic of coronavirus tested the sh*t out of humanity. Stores were closed, schools and uni were closed, travel plans were cancelled, events were cancelled, people lost their jobs and homes, essential workers were abused, and loved ones passed away. It shook our lives in a way that we never expected, and we spent most of the year figuring out how to adjust while trying to stay safe.
I am aware that some countries and regions around the world are still in the midst of the pandemic and that I am extremely privileged to be in Brisbane where the situation is not as chaotic. My heart goes out to everyone who is doing their best to fend off this virus. Indeed, I worry about my family and friends who are scattered around the world for their safety everyday.
In spite of the chaos, I would like to propose for everyone to have a Bonenkai for themselves. If possible and appropriate, invite your family and friends. Bring your favorite things - food, drink, games, books, movies, pets - and just sit together. Try to forget all the bad you went through and appreciate all the good you witnessed or experienced. Share them with your family and friends in a yarning circle. And pat yourselves on the back. Congratulate yourselves for making it through to the end of the year 2020, and talk about what you look forward to in the year 2021. I, for sure, look forward to traveling around the country again.
What’s your most proud achievement this year? And what do you look forward to for next year?
Take care and cheers! (乾杯!)
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