Uncontrollable and lost

I cannot write too much about what has happened as I’m still dealing with my raw emotions but something bad happened tonight.

Don’t worry no one has died or injured. Only my emotions being shuttered and I’m lost by some people being such assholes!!

While I try to deal with my raw emotions, part of me automatically thought very logically and sorted the issue. I guess it’s my business brain reacted that way. Once things are sorted I had this very heavy emotions left, my heart pounding very fast. What to do? Dying to see my husband and talk about it but he is in his work, I cannot bother him right now. I sat on the chair, listening to frogs singing out in the fields.

When you are down, feeling negative, there are 3 things to improve your mood.

1. Change the focus
2. Change the language
3. Change the posture

I thought about these three things. Did I try? Nope, I was so overwhelmed with my emotions I could not even try. When you are at the rawest of the raw, nothing improves your mood.

Finally my husband came home and I talked, talked and talked. Felt bit better afterwards, he is my savior. He joked a bit to make me laugh, he is my savior.

30mins more listening to the frogs and uncontrollably going around the same issue in my head. Here I am, writing. My way of settling my emotions.

Close my eyes and focus my own thoughts.
What bothered me the most is people’s super shallow capacity, they are so tight, stingy and cannot accept others being happy.

What a miserable life.
It must be horrible living that way, always trying to pull others legs because those people seem happier.

I guess this is a lesson for me so I’ll have empathy and compassion for others.

I’m not gonna be an asshole.