Kyrgyzstan through my eyes 2. On board

I hate preparation in both material and spiritual terms. 

After completing the training camp that JICA provided, we, all volunteers were given about 10 days to 50 days to get everything ready for our departures. We, team Kyrgyzstan were one of the earliest ones to leave Japan and we had about 10 days to be all done and dusted. The training camp was 70-day long, which flew like an arrow.

Finishing the training means that you are officially a volunteer. It is not until you come home and sit there alone that you finally realize you are facing reality. It was somehow a very weird feeling for me that part of me always wanted the thing to happen soon, but the other part gives me anxiety and tells me I am not ready. I had been waiting this moment to happen for over a year and suddenly I was not sure I was okay with all the decisions I made. 

The brightest thing about leaving early is that you are most likely to remember what you have learned through the two-month language program, while the most disappointing one would be leaving your loved ones and say goodbye to them way too soon. The latter probably is the main factor why I felt I was not ready even though I looked as if I had been ready and cool with that. Deep in my heart, there was always a tiny distraction that was bugging me every time I saw my wife and told her everything was going to work alright. 

I was the one who wanted to be part of the program and I knew it ceartenly was a selfish decision and I was never going to be able to convince her enough to make her feel okay. She understood my aims and ambitions and supported me each time, but that does not mean I can do however I want my life to be. You make a tough decision and life just flows the way it wants.

I had an amazing time with her till right before our departure at the airport. She even helped me out with buying necessities, thinking about what to buy together with me. Imagine you are going to spend two years in an unfamiliar country with scarce information about it. You are not sure what kind of things you can and cannot get there. The airline allows you one suitcase with a 20-kilogram maximum and one carry-on luggage. How are you going to fit everything in? 

You must choose what not to bring after deep deliberation. The most difficult part comes after you have bought what is necessary and put them with must-to-take things together in your suitcase. If you cannot take everything that you think is necessary, what has to be done? 

Make a priority list and take the things from the top of the list. It is as simple as it seems but leaving the things you have bought for this could be heartbreaking. I decided to ship some stuff that did not fit into since it was impossible for me to do as I mentioned above. I double-checked what I should bring with and left for the airport.

My wife was kind enough to come with me. We then met up with other volunteers and those who them off like my wife. We were chatting and spending a peaceful time together until when I realized that I was missing something, something really important. 

Have you ever gotten a cold sweat in your life or anytime you can remember: that moment that makes you go blank and feel you do not know what to do? Sometimes a person with the most careful preparation could fall off a cliff. 

I remember sweat streaming down my face as I accepted the fact that I forgot to bring my dollars. How could I possibly have forgotten to bring money? How am I supposed to survive with some Mr. Yukichis (Japanese man who is on 10,000 yen) in Kyrgyzstan? They are only paper that are worthless and probably end up with alternative toilet paper that students use sometimes when they cannot find their toilet paper! It was the scariest moment that I had for the first time in a long time, at least I cannot remember when I felt that way last time. My heart was pounding so hard that I felt blood flowing through my body. I was breathing fast and I lost a word for a moment. It was almost 11 pm and I knew I did not have much time left till the security check.

I was lucky it was not worse. I was not alone. Frozen just for a moment, I asked help to my wife and my colleagues and they gave me some advice on what I should do next. One of my colleagues, who had some extra dollars, even offered me to lend some money in case I failed to prepare the dollar. Fortunately, we found an ATM and an exchange counter that was still available, and I managed to rush and exchange yen to the dollar right on time before we had to go through the security gate. It is a little bit exaggerating to say but I am extremely thankful for them to have spared my life. It was stupid of me not bringing a penny and I was about to live a life there. It was an embarrassing moment, too, for I had never done such a rudimentary mistake.

Looking back, it was the worst yet most unforgettable one, which reminded me that there is always someone who you can rely on in times of need. Having someone like that is a blessing and you should not let them slip off from you.

I am feeling the pressure pushing me against the seat, hearing the engine roaring and my stomach is floating in the air. 

I am awake.

If you haven't read the first episode, check it out!

1. Before it all started 

Click below to the 3rd episode.

3. Arriving