Noe, You're Selfish

　Hiroe Akasaka weighed heavily on the neck of Noe Seto, her lover. Her intense weight made Noe unable to breathe.
''I saw something on the news today. White cops pressed a Black person this way in America. He was in so much pain. In fact, the Black guy died after that. Do you think there's such an incident in Japan? Like, a Japanese cop killing a Korean person. I don't think it exists. America is such a barbaric country. It's ridiculously understandable that Trump could become the president."
　Noe listened to Hiroe's words in her dazed consciousness.
"I'd love to take a picture of your face with my phone. It's a masterpiece."
　Noe noticed that a voice was leaking from her mouth that sounded like a blowfish's death agony. Still, suddenly, Hiroe stood up, and Noe was relieved of thick suffering. She felt her lungs twitch as she blurted the vomit onto the floor.
"Oh my God! Noe, you're selfish"
　Saying that, Hiroe got a rag and a plastic bag, and started cleaning up the vomit. Noe laid on the cold floor, taking a look at the scene. Hiroe cleaned up the vomit with the diligence of a gallant mother. Noe was reminded of her own mother. Once, she had eaten so much pork cutlets that she had thrown up unintentionally. Although her mother had complained,  she had cleaned it up. While this memory warmed Noe's heart, Hiroe stroked Noe's cheek with a smile.
　Noe was lying on the couch. She didn't want to do anything. She had been fired from her travel agency because of the coronavirus, and left jobless. The shock of it all sent her into a kind of depression, and she couldn't escape from the murderous malaise she felt every day. Nevertheless, it was necessary for Hiroe, who was now supporting the household, to play the role of a housewife. But now she laid on the couch, as unmoving as the dead worm that fell on the roadside. Noe's emotions were on the verge of death from Hiroe's repeated violence.
　On the couch, Noe heard a faint noise echoing through the air. It was probably the sound of Hiroe tapping on the keyboard. She was telecommuting and stayed home all the time. That meant that there was no getting away from her. Noe's brain was irritated by the sharp sounds that frequently resounded. It felt as if a raw finger was being poked into the flesh of the brain marrow. Suddenly, she felt the desire to kill Hiroe. But it seemed like an unattainable dream, and she put it in the back of her mind.
　And then Hiroe came. She could see the weariness in Hiroe's face. She crouched down in front of Noe, and stroked her cheek.
"Are you okay? Do you feel sick?"
"Yeah, kind of."
　Hiroe smiled like a benevolent goddess.
"I'll make lunch for you then."
　Hiroe made a spaghetti meat sauce and Noe ate it. Hiroe also took a picture of it with her cell phone, and started eating it. It was a very simple dish, but it had a kind of peaceful warmth that permeated Noe's heart. She wished this kind of time could go on forever, but she knew that it couldn't happen.
　Noe was only allowed out by Hiroe when she went for walks and shopping. This time she went out of the room to take a walk. Just then, another resident appeared from the side room. Noe was always amazed by the woman's appearance. She was about 190 centimeters tall and her shoulders are extremely broad. Her body was like a huge refrigerator clothed in fat. Noe predicted that the women might be doing judo. And her face was very dignified, reminiscent of that of a samurai. The woman was a type of person that Noe had never met before.
"Hello."
"............hello."
　Noe had only ever exchanged greetings with the woman. She hoped to have a conversation someday.
　Noe was walking outside for a while. It felt like the depression of being confined to a room was fading away. Even now that the coronavirus had spread, the town's landscape remained largely unchanged. Even if humans were to die out, wouldn't this scene be the same?. At any rate, she hoped that the twilight tinted landscape that fell from this sky would remain forever.
　Then we reached the park. This was the place where Hiroe and she had our first date. They had sat on the bench together at night, and had talked about petty things. Hiroe had said she liked karaage, Japanese fried chicken, so she had made some karaage, and had brought it to her. She had eaten it while smiling like an elementary school student. Noe had savored the heart-breaking pleasure. Then they had slid down the slide together many times. By the end, she had had a pain in the ass.
　Hiroe squeezed Noe's neck with her right hand, while her left hand stimulated Noe's clitlis.
"Does it feel good?"
　Noe's body convulsed, unable to say anything. In the overwhelming agony, she wished that God would kill her now. But the suffering did not end there. Hiroe's fingers were digging into the flesh of her neck more and more strongly. A grotesque future with fingers and neck in one piece came to mind, but she desperately denied it. The worst part was that this suffering was also, in a way, a pleasure. Hiroe knew how to stimulate her clitoris. The addictive nausea gripped her mind as pleasure mingled with suffering. Noe's body convulsed like a squid exposed to direct sunlight. And she was made to climax in an unruly way. Noe lost her strength and sinked into the bed. But when Hiroe saw this, she began to strangle Noe with both her arms.
　Late at night, beside Hiroe, Noe was unable to sleep. She felt her own emotions and cells slowly dying. Hiroe's body odor was as strong as a wild hyena to Noe, and it scratched the membrane of her nose. Noe tried to think about something else. For example, about the big woman who lived next door. She imagined a future where she would be like a prince on a white horse, coming to help her from violence. Her body was muscular, yet supple, as if she has the best of both men and women together. Noe curled up like a cat in the woman's chest. Then she kissed her again and again on the neckline.
　In the morning, she was awakened by Hiroe's crying.
"What's going on?"
　Noe asked her so.
"I've been mean to Noe."
　Hiroe said.
"I'm hurting you. I've been hurting your feelings for a long time. And yet, I continue to hurt you while pretending to be a victim and refusing to admit my guilt. I'm an awful person. I don't deserve to live.
　With those words, Noe embraced Hiroe's body.
"No, it's not. You're a good person. Sometimes you can't control your horrible heart, but you try to keep it. I'll be with you all the way, so let's keep at it together. Someday we'll get through this time."
"Do you really think so?"
"I think. I think so."
　Hiroe cried loudly. Noe stroked her back gently.
　In the morning, Noe and Hiroe were watching the news. Hiroe's cheeks were like ripe apples, which seemed so pretty, so she poked it with her index finger.
"Hey, what's up?"
　Hiroe said with a laugh.
"Nothing. It's nothing."
　Noe replied, feigning expressionlessness.
"Hey, I heard there's a Blue Impulse flying in the sky. Let's see if we can see it from here."
"Hmm, I don't know."
　The news was reporting that Blue Impulse, a squadron of fighter jets, would be flying in the sky to support medical workers fighting the coronavirus. Hiroe excitedly walked out onto the veranda with the bread in her hand. Reluctantly, Noe followed her. They watched the blue sky for a while, and after a shuddering sensation in the air, they saw a small meteor-like fighter jet flying through the sky. Then the fighters drew a line that could shine white in the sky.
"Great, great!"
　Hiroe was so excited, she's frolicking for the Blue Impulse. And with her phone, she took pictures of the landscape over and over again. However, Noe felt something unpleasant. She couldn't explain it in words, but in this world right now, the landscape of fighter jets flying around Tokyo and people getting excited about it seemed grotesque. If Hiroe wasn't here, she wanted to spit at the sky right now. Even if it had not reached the fighters and fallen on her face.
　You're an idiot.
　Noe thought in her heart.
　Suddenly, Hiroe was surprised when she brought a cake.
"Hey, did you forget your own birthday?"
　Hiroe laughed bitterly, but really, Noe had forgotten her own birthday. After she sang "Happy Birthday", they began to eat cake. Of course, Hiroe took a photo of the cake with her phone. First, Noe decided to eat the strawberries on top of it. The moment she put it in her mouth, the murderous sweetness enveloped your tongue, surprising you. But it was a joy to be glad of. The sweetness popped like a red spark. Noe was happy for the first time in a long time. All the dead emotions and cells came to life at once. But Noe's joy quickly deflated when she learned that there were almonds in the cake. She had told Hiroe many times that she hated almonds and that she didn't like cakes with them. She seemed to have forgotten about it. Still not wanting to ruin this euphoric atmosphere, she continued to eat the cake with a smile on her face. But the almonds tormented Noe like an unpleasant stone.
"What's going on?"
　Hiroe asked, and Noe was horrified.
"Nothing. It's nothing."
"There's something wrong."
　Saying this, Hiroe continued to eat her cake.
"You're hiding something."
　From those words, it's clear that Noe has forgotten that she didn't like almonds, and Noe felt dismayed.
"There's nothing,  nothing. The cake is delicious."
"Tell me. I'm not mad at you."
"I said there's nothing."
"You're lying. Noe's face, there's something unpleasant."
"Hey there's nothing!"
"You have it, tell me!"
　After shouting that, Hiroe began to destroy the cake with her fists. In a moment, the cake turned into a white corpse. And the white blood spattered all over the room. Noe was immobilized with fear, while Hiroe continued to destroy the cake, shouting gibberish. Then she threw a lump of cake at Noe. A tide of white blood spread across her cheeks. Hiroe continued to throw lumps of cake endlessly. Noe continued to bathe in blood, unable to avoid or escape.
　When Noe went to a supermarket nearby called "Itsumi", she found the woman. She was shopping, just like herself. Noe decided to track down the woman. What is she buying? Long onions, tomatoes, king trumpet mushroom, tofu, natto, yogurt, chicken breast, beef shoulder loin, vinegar, meat sauce, potato chips, beer, and bread. The amount was quite large. When she thought about how that huge body was cultivated by the large amount of food, she felt deeply attached to that fact.
　After she was back home, she thought about the woman on the couch. After being rescued by a woman, the two of them hid in a large cave nearby. They spent time in the midst of it, huddled together. Contrary to the muscularity of her appearance, her body odor was as sweet as the strawberries she had eaten earlier. When it went into her nose, it stroked the skin stimulatingly like a red spark. Guided by that luscious scent, Noe gazed at the woman's dignified face. Obsidian-like eyes, noble purple lips, nasal beams as sharp as statues, and black, powerful eyebrows. Everything about it was fascinating, and Noe's heart was gently held by its charm. Then, naturally, she kissed the woman on the lips. The lips were a mixture of sweet and sour, like raspberries. It was also a great one.
　She wanted to eat everything about the woman like a piece of cake. Surely there would be no almonds in her, either. Noe thought as she devoured the woman's body. The woman doesn't seem to be used to sex, and she was completely assaulted by Noe's lips and could only let out a young, adorable gasp. Her cheeks, her collarbone, her shoulder blades, her waist, her breasts, her knees, her female genitalia, her pubic hair, her navel. Everything had a rich flavor that made Noe want to die.
　Noe continued to masturbate on the sofa while such fantasies swirled around her.
"What are you doing?"
　Before she knew it, Hiroe was standing in front of the door.
　Hiroe thrusted the dildo attached to her waist into Noe's anus. Noe let out a dull scream, but Hiroe didn't stop shaking her hips. The rhythm became more and more violent, and the flesh of her anus was being destroyed. Noe cried out in indescribable, intense pain, and massive amounts of sticky drool flowed from her lips. This cruelty was carried out until Hiroe was satisfied. By that time, Noe's mind was completely broken. After the dildo was pulled from Noe's anus, she staggered and headed for the bathroom. When she checked the bottom of the urinal after urinating, it was stained with blood. Noe's heart trembled at the sight of the murder scene. But as time went on, that shudder morphed into something else.
　Noe grabbed a kitchen knife and then went to the bedroom. She thrusted the kitchen knife into Hiroe's belly. She giggled, not knowing what had happened at first. However, she began to scream as if he had been attacked by severe pain. She tried to get up, but she fell to the floor in a miserable way. So Noe thrusted the kitchen knife into Hiroe's back several times.
"Help me, help meeeeeeee."
　Hiroe crawled around on the floor, and Noe looked at her back. She looked like a centipede bathed in red paint. Noe undid her pants and thrusted a knife into her anus. Then the front door opened. Noe was surprised to see that it was that neighbor's woman. It made her happy at the same time. Let's go to a new place with me, she thought.
　The woman came up to Noe and punched her on the cheek with ferocious force, knocking her to the floor. The woman's knees completely held Noe's neck, and she couldn't breathe decently. In the midst of her clouded consciousness, Noe saw Hiroe take a picture of her on the phone.
"Ahahahahahaha."