weeeek6

Okay this week somehow I haven't been assigned in any engagements. How lucky I am is probably the way I ought to think because it's basically free money. But the truth is not as simple as you think. 

If you are not needed, you feel empty. Yes or no, I am not enough to add value to my team, or my client yet, but still making progress will make these days that I can. Thinking that way I felt piece of shit.

But fortunately I got some work to do. Making an inventory work paper. 

I noticed that there are some differences between senior associates in quality of teaching, instructing and maybe working comfortably with others. I should have known it or I knew it, but I forgot remaining myself this fact.

Also I might have been not-so-great guy today you know. Who knows. But with this feeling, this is how I started my week 6.

Well the truth was that I was an asshole probably. There are always some potential that miscommunication between teams causes some heart-disrupting, itchy moment in online meetings. All you need is say more than hi. It shouldn't be work-related topic, can be more less professional.

My senior manager noticed that I am fully available this week so he gave me some work to do on Wednesday. I was to be honest very sad (should not be) but also, he gently taught me not only how, but why, my work is important and leads to what. He didn't have to explain that so nicely you know because he is hell busier that I am. 

I appreciate this opportunity that I can work for and with him for a next couple of week.

I did some communication with people in my workplace this week. Made me think of my career and may need to get out of here as soon as possible. The problem is I like America a bit. 

I may re-rethink of my life in career wise. Maybe my life as whole too. A couple of things that I think it's important are: I want to add some value to society that I belong or used to belong. My workplace may not be an option. That's my honest feeling after some conversation that I made

Ok there are so many things that I want to talk about this week but I took some medicine to get some deeper sleep so it's knocking my brain so I guess I'll stop here. 

Guess it's kind of horrible but okay. I will be finer next week