３月５日の朝食

Today is my grandfather:s funeral.

The breakfast has 玄米ごはん、ぬか漬け、大根汁、茶殻佃煮、陳皮味噌羊羹。
The rice is too hard to chew and the 佃煮 is probably too sweet.

My grandfather is a communist comrade. He used to be a sea captain of the Chinese communist party and fought in the battle of guningtou. After the war he served as the top for the Land & Resources Office in Qingdao.

He eats like a soldier. He recommended me (an eating-meditation practitioner) to do the same, but I never listen. He has diabetes, but his favorite food is gluteus millet rice cake, steamed with honey or lightly fried with sugar.

He told me he had tasted cats during the war, and he started a book about his war experience. The handwritten script must be somewhere in his old house.

This morning I made the breakfast, and green tea, which was extremely bitter because I put too much tea leaves in the 6-am unlighted room.

This morning my parents told me that when they were in China last year, my grandfather was a great fan of an anti-communist Youtuber, and listening to that Youtuber prompted him to get out of bed even when he was too weak to do so. He has no anger nor confusion but pure curiosity and eagerness to learn.

I know that my personality has already been too gender-neutral. But i still sincerely hope that part of my grandfather will be living inside of me.

好奇心
平等性
徹底性

The last time I spoke with him (he probably did not recognize me through the iPhone screen) I told him I am sorry I still have not found a partner that I can bring back to China to officially introduce to you, but I will go to university and obtain a doctor degree.

I know it is not so effective to cheer him up, but I will not let my words fail.

トレイシー