The reason why there are so many unhappy people in Japan

Japanese people don't know how to build an equal relationship with other people

There are so many unhealthy relationships between people in Japan, for example, family members, friends coworkers and so on. In a word, the ruler and the ruled relationship.

I have seen a lot of cases of bullies among students in school, and I can say that both the abusers and the bullied don't know how to build an equal relationship with someone else because they have never seen or formed such an equal relationship in their family before; couples (parents for children) without loving and respecting each other but never divorce because of money and the sake of appearances, a member control the others, they frequently pick a fight with other family members or relatives, they show cold and disrespectful behavior to others, etc..

My family was also a kind of dysfunctional one. My mom always complained about her marriage and her mother in law, who was my grandmother. Actually my grandma controlled and bullied my mom when I was young and I didn't remember things. Because of that, I am not good at building an equal and intimate relationship with people, I guess.

You can easily find someone who wants to control someone else

 Not only in a family but also every organization you can easily find someone who wants to control someone else physically and mentally. Such bad relationships make other chain reactions. People who were controlled or abused once would likely control and abuse others next time.

However, surviving a situation in which such the ruler and the ruled relationship is common sometimes needs excess adaptation; trying to make the rulers' mood better, prompting unfairness and selfishness of theirs in order to make them less offensive or abusive, or reluctantly collaborating them in doing something wrong, and so on. 

I remember awkward feelings with some girls who seek attention from boys

I remember wondering why some girls of my classmates changed their behavior and their tone of speaking in front of boys. I couldn't understand those changes and hated that. But now I guess that that was the excess adjustment and a kind of survival strategy. 

I didn't feel safe and I was marginalized because I didn't do the same things as they did. However, for the sake of that, I am an introvert and being only myself doesn't bother me. 

Women have been exploited in every organization 

I think that my mom exploited me unconsciously; In general, children are loyal to their parents. Because of such loyalty, I thought that I had to listen to her complaints, her unhappy life stories, and how terrible my grandma did to her, etc.. I also felt that my parents didn't love and respect each other. My brother didn't have to do that because he was her favorite. She always let him stick to her. Even now he doesn't understand my situation and feelings during those times.

Even in a family, women have to accept a burden and negative impacts more than men. It's not too much to say that the Japanese society manages to make ends meet with women's various sacrifices. The government, the law system and other things prompt those sacrifices in every field and issue, for example, raising children, nursing care for elderly or sick people in a family, in short, whole housework. Is it the medieval period now?

Japanese women have already noticed that for long time. That's why they choose not to marry and have kids. Japanese men, especially old guys have been ignorant about such pre-modernity of Japan. They don't have empathic ability to feel women's feelings.

As long as male centered systems don't change, Japanese society won't stop its decline by any means. Nobody will be happy.