the box 3

After graduating from the
junior high school,
I entered the high school. ――

Koharu found and enrolled to the
girl's high school
providing correspondence course.

I went to a public high school nearby.

By this time, Koharu was less likely to
lose physical condition or
suffer from a seizure.

It was not because
her phobia has eased.

That's because she got better at
dealing with the phobia.

It could be rephrased that
she couldn't touch with men...

However, although it's not directly,
Koharu was able to contact with
the opposite sex.

She started with social media service
called SNS.

When I become a high school student,
I got a permit from the staff of our facility
and started a part-time job.

It was a flower shop in a shopping mall.

When I was a kid, I loved
the pretend flower shop that
my mother played together.

So I had a yearning to work
at a flower shop.

And I purchased a mobile phone,
spending my part time salary.

We can use a computer at the facility
for only one hour.

Koharu spends that one hour
for research.

So we did SNS on my mobile phone.

When we were together,
I shared my smart phone with Koharu.

There was no heterosexual friend
in Koharu.

Therefore, when she interact with
the opposite sex online,
she has to make conversation with
whom she really doesn't know.

Whenever Koharu got a comment
from a male user,
Koharu asked me, "Is this all right?"

Thinking about it myself, I said,
"I think it's okay."

And then, Koharu was returning to
put some comments.

Koharu was happy to be able to
interact with a man without any fear.

Koharu was scared of male,
but she doesn't hate it.

Actually,
I am the one who hate male.

My father abandoned
both of my mother and me
and chose another woman...

One day, Koharu was invited to
meet a boy directly.

This is the boy whom
Koharu became friends online.

If you are doing SNS,
it is a possible story.

Koharu has become scared.

All she has to do is
turn down and don't worry.

However, Koharu was shocked
when she was scared
just by being invited.

Having trouble effort,
she could be able to interact with
the opposite sex.

She just interacted with male
through SNS, but it
makes her feel deep depressed.

Koharu was a girl who raises her tension
by looking at actors and screams
"He is so cool!!"

Koharu didn't hate men,
but she was scared,
which seemed sorrowful.

I wanted to hug Koharu,
who was getting smaller in the room,
but I couldn't do that either.

Koharu was unstable before,
so I just tried to relieve herself.

I managed to put my hand on
Koharu's shoulder
while calling out her name.

However, Koharu would be frightened
and even scared me.

I can't give her a hug and
reassure in Koharu.

Even if I'm a woman.

Thus, Koharu's phobia may be called
contact phobia.

I don't know if there is such a word.

Koharu started avoiding to deal
with men even on SNS.

But it's not all bad things.

Koharu likes fashion, but we didn't spend
much money on clothes.

That's why we used to buy
second hand clothes
at a recycle shop.

Koharu cut it, sewed it, 　
and sometimes dyed it,
recreating it to her favorite ones.

She also made accessories by hand,
using things that would be sold at
100 yen shop.

At the shopping mall
where I had a part-time job,
there was a 100 yen shop.

I remember being often asked
to do a shopping there by Koharu.

Koharu was wearing those
hand-made clothes
with handmade accessories,
and she posted photos to SNS.

Koharu's photos were full of
comments and they were also
pressed the like button.

Koharu had a hard time to go out
and make friends because of the fear.

However, thanks to SNS,
she was connected to many girls.

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