A Moment of Boasting or a Lifetime of Grudges?

2024年6月8日 16:17

How do you think about social boasting on social media? People brag about "exclusive" parties and intimate dinners at private villas. Once, Yukio Mishima wrote that as a matter of party etiquette, "one must never speak of having been invited." This is because someone who believed they were in the "inner circle" but was not invited might feel shocked and, worse, might bear a grudge if they found out about the event. Those who gleefully post about these exclusive gatherings seem to lack the imagination to consider how those feeling left out might feel. Or perhaps, they do understand and post such content precisely to flaunt and provoke jealousy.

There is a film that reveals the timeless and universal nature of social climbing: "The Capote Tapes." Truman Capote is well-known as the author of masterpieces like "Breakfast at Tiffany's" and "In Cold Blood," but he was also infamous in his time as a party aficionado. His "Black and White Ball," touted as the party of the century, was a masquerade ball held at the Plaza Hotel, to which he invited 500 handpicked celebrities from various fields after three months of meticulous selection. This event is considered a pinnacle in New York's social history.

What made it extraordinary was that the guest list, comprising "the rich, the beautiful, and the powerful" from all sectors, was published in The New York Times. Those who were not selected were reportedly furious.

However, that was precisely Capote's intention. It was a revenge of sorts by a diminutive gay man from the countryside against the social elites who had looked down on him. It was revenge for his mother's suicide, a woman who yearned for and was denied entry into high society. The party's "success" lay in the effectiveness of this slight to those uninvited. How terrifying. Capote's subsequent downfall due to his overreaching actions suggests that the grudges held by those he snubbed at the "Black and White Ball" played no small part in his decline.

To bring this back to the point: in the realm of parties, one must be aware of the danger of the "unease" felt by those not invited. If you choose to make such gatherings public despite this knowledge, be prepared to face the resentment and the resulting contempt that may come your way.